The Shame of “Type A”

I took a personality test before writing this post.  The test can be found HERE.  The range was 35-380.  380 is extremely Type “A” … I scored a 300.

So I guess I’m pretty far on the spectrum. 

That isn’t really surprising.  If I was honest, I would confess to being impatient, having high standards, and I have trouble handling my stress.  I also often take charge, I’m goal oriented, and find myself being competitive.  I do become irritated when left waiting or wasting time, I have a hard time smelling the roses, and – I am a “fast talker.”  Apparently – even talking quickly is part of “type A.”  Finally, I am driven for success, am ambitious, and like to be the best.  At everything. 

Often, people associate Type A with things negative, but the truth is – I like to believe that I am a good person.  I have friends who are also “type A” … and I believe they are good people as well.  However… I need to remember to hold myself accountable to my values above my personality traits.

This post is really about the pursuit of happiness… or just the pursuit. 

Ever since I went to BlogHer a few weeks ago, I’ve been trying to process all the information they gave us.  I installed Google Analytics.  I’ve been looking at things like “bounce rate” and “unique visitors.”  I’ve found myself thinking things like, “Why didn’t I install this months ago?”  I couldn’t just be happy in the now. 

I’ve been trying to use Twitter more (ALSFM) and my Facebook page more… in my quest to be the best.  Not just happy with being… but trying to be the best.

And with teaching.  My passion.  My heart’s song.  It is not enough to go in and deliver a lesson and walk out.  I want to be the best.  Not for recognition from students or colleagues… but because mediocre is just not enough.

This pursuit has been swelling in my type A stress filled life for awhile.  All the while I try to slow down with my family – smell the roses – hug my children – I find myself racing forward in the pursuit of my goal oriented happiness filled dreams.

If only we have a house with two bathrooms.  If only my blog became a big thing.  If only we get this seizure dog.  If only Alexander has more therapy.  If only I can reach more students.  If only….

But, you see – I have these incredible friends.  They are my barometer on all those negative associations that come with the Type A.  They are the people that I call to help put things in perspective.  And because they helped me with that perspective, I am going to go ahead and pass some of that wisdom along.

I want to win that IPad for Alexander.  I want to win it so badly that I made a video with him touching my IPhone and I explained how it would benefit him.  I think he is  the cutest kid on the block.  I stand by my post on why I love Halloween.



BUT….

I need to remember that I am “competing” against my friends for this coveted gift.  I need to remember that winning isn’t everything.  I need to remember… that even an Iphone (which – honestly is too small for Alexander to manipulate) is more than some have.  I need to remember that some people do not have the means to any of these things.  I need to remember that some people don’t have the support system in place that we do.  I need to remember that some people have not been given the gifts we have.

I would still like for Alexander to win the IPad.  He will be amazing with it.  But.

Happiness is:
Friends who will stand by me through my “forever” times.
Family who loves and supports us constantly.
Loved ones who … just love us.

Happiness does not come from things.  It could all wash away.  And if I was left … a “loser” surrounded only by people who love us – we would still be the most blessed people.

Happiness is us.  Type A or not.  Happiness exists here. 

Are you happy?  Can you be happy without the pursuit?  What have you given up to reclaim your happiness?


Thanks – Shell…. for allowing us to link up (once again.)