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Monday, May 16, 2011

Am I a special needs blog?

Let me back up for a minute....

I applied to be on "BlogHer". I'm not sure if they will pick my blog or not.  I decided it would be nice to try to see if I could get more readers with a little more exposure.  We shall see. 

I knew the question was coming..... what "type" of blog am I?  I was debating what to put down as the answer....



I don't want to be a Special Needs parent blog. 

Kelle Hampton has a really great blog, and while her daughter has Down Syndrome, her blog is really more about the "Special" of her life and less about the "Needs."  I want my blog to be like that.  Not just like her's - but often I feel like this is so serious.  I read her posts and I think.... "She celebrates all that is 'normal' in life."  And while I try to celebrate the normalness, but the truth is... we are not normal. 

Me at Alexander's bedside
Kelle's daughter has Down Syndrome.  It is a "fear" of most moms.  It is the thing most doctors offer to test for. It is the label no one wants to hear for their child. And yet... she moves past that label.  That label only enters her "on line" world sporadically.  Her blog is sunshine... so much sunshine.  I love the sunshine, but in PA- sometimes it rains.  It is amazing how life moves us onto a sliding scale.  She does not focus on the needs, so sometimes I wonder how "needy" she might think Nella is.  (I'm taking way to long to get to the point.)  When I look at her precious daughter, I don't see needs... because she is only 3 months older than Alexander and seems to have less delays.  No feeding tube. No Seizures. Yes to Sitting. Yes to Eating. ... blah blah blah. 

I could dwell on this. The sliding scale.  The differences between our blogs. The special needs blog with all these circumstances and the fact that they do exist in our lives - versus - the blog about life...where Down Syndrome is a tiny speck and the needs don't seem so great.


Where will that get me? How will that make anyone (me, Alexander, our friends, our family, or our readers) better?

So back to the blog - I clicked on "family" because there was no "special needs" button.  - But the truth is - I'm more special needs than I am family.  Because our life is equal in the  special and the needs.

The sliding scale has put Alexander on the side with more serious delays.  I'm sure there are kids out there with more serious delays and wonder how "needy" I think Alexander is.  The truth is - we are just us.  I know Alexander's needs. Sometimes I am sad and we have rain.  Usually I try to be happy and live in the sunshine.  But, I can't be someone I'm not, live someone else's life, or pretend that our circumstances don't exist.

We are a Special Needs Blog. And I'm totally ok with that because we also have so much more in our lives.  A twin mommy blog. A teacher blog. A wife blog. A _______ blog.  Where ever the day may take us blog.

I'm ok with Special Needs. I'm ok with us.



4 Comments:

At May 16, 2011 at 9:24 PM , Blogger PrincessMommyPants said...

I love it!! I just lost my nephew in September to (SMA)Spinal Muscular Atrophy. He was the most amazing kid it has been my honor to know. At his funeral - there was standing room only in the chapel and the overflow room. He was special but not because his needs were different, or because he had a lable somewhere in the fine print, but because of who he was and how very very special a gift he was!!

Special is an honor, a gift to be shared and celebrated, but a very costly one at times. Keep up being proud of being unique! Who cares if we can't fit in their neat boxes right?

 
At May 17, 2011 at 3:44 AM , Blogger Amy said...

Your family is normal. Everybody's family is normal. We're all just normal in our own special way, and my normal is much different that PrincessMommyPants' normal, which is different from your normal. People ask me all the time how I manage with 5 kids on my own, and I tell them that it is just our life - it is what we make of it.

Celebrate your normal - and celebrate your specialness (is that a word? it's getting late) - because all of that together is what makes you unique!

 
At May 20, 2011 at 5:57 PM , Blogger Heather said...

Hi Kristen! I just found your blog and love it. I don't know if you'll remember, but we met last summer in Utah... my son Frank is 17 months old now. I loved this post because I too read Kelle's blog and it too makes me think about that sliding scale of needs. Even among WHS kids, there is a sliding scale. I read about seizures and hospitalizations, and I think - wow, Frank isn't so needy. And then I read something like Kelle's blog, and I think - if only Frank could sit, point, and play as Nella does. He's so much needier. Anyway, I think unless your trying to make a profit off your blog (and there's certainly nothing wrong with that), then a blog doesn't really need a niche type, does it? It can totally float with whatever kind of day you're having. :)

 
At May 20, 2011 at 11:09 PM , Blogger Kristen said...

Thanks everyone. I feel ok with where we are. And Heather - I do remember you. I'm so glad you are following us now!

 

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