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MMLM: I will Run for a Big Mac

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Monday, November 7, 2011

MMLM: I will Run for a Big Mac

I hate to run. I mean hate.  As in…

I would rather have my teeth drilled.  Get a weggie for life.  Go without talking for a month.   I’m not a runner.

I joke that the only way people will see me run is to get a Big Mac.

When I was in high school – I was the goalie in field hockey because I hated to run.

In softball – a homerun only came if I hit the ball out of the park. 

I sweat like a pig.

It is painful for others to watch.

Sort of like Phoebe from Friends

Still not my “Make Me Laugh Monday” Photo…

Does it mean you’ve hit rock bottom when you make a tape to be on Biggest Loser?  ‘Cause – then I’ve hit rock bottom.  If it doesn’t mean you’ve hit rock bottom…. then I will let you know what comes next. Smile

Anyway, I thought – this is ridiculous! I can’t leave my family for 3 months to go get skinny healthy with hot Bob and win a Million dollars or so while doing it!  I should just go for a run

And then I remembered that I hate to run.

So I downloaded “Couch to 5K” on my IPhone. (There was never a more literal translation of this app.)

Immediately I had a list of questions:

What should I wear?  What will make my butt jiggle more like J-Lo and less like Jell-O?  Can I do it? Every time I see people before a big race – they are all lined up at the bathroom… What if I have to poop on my run?  (I was headed to a park.) Should I get new runner’s shoes?  What about my sweating problem? I think I have to poop now…

I tried to find a sweat headband and get ready to go run.  I couldn’t find one… so I attempted a substitute

This is me. Ready for a run. Day 1 – Run 1 – On Couch to 5K.  With one of the twin’s bandanas on my head to catch my excessive sweat. 

I’m trying to look tough. ..

Plan thwarted when Raymond informed me that he would not take me to the park looking that ridiculous.  (And he usually puts up with my ridiculousness.)

So we went. I ran. (A bit).  And I walked. (A lot).  But I did it.  I didn’t die…  And there was no Big Mac at the end of the line. 

(Oh…. and it was definitely Jell-O … not J-Lo.)

 Want to know a secret?  When I run with Alexander, people think he’s a newborn so I look like I’m just getting back in shape after having a baby. HaHa!
IMG_0396     IMG_0395
This is quite possibly the stupidest thing I’ve done… ever.  Learning to run in PA in November / December.

List of things I need – now that I’m a serious runner:
* Running Sneakers
* Sweat Headband
* Face Mask to keep me from developing “Runner’s Asthma”
* Under armor Shirt
* Under armor Pants
* Pants that hide my rear end while I run.
* Shoot – how about a new body that looks like I should be running?
* Socks without holes

Probably you will see me on Biggest Loser next month. Smile

So…  Share.  Make Us All Laugh.  Just Link up.  If you would be so kind as to put the button on your page – that would rock too. 


Ps. We just got word.... the Halloween Contest is out.  PLEASE - go to and VOTE for Alexander.  You can only vote 1 time - at   You need to scroll down almost to the bottom - and look for Alexander as a cowboy. And click! 
There are so many apps that can help him reach learn, reach milestones, and even communicate with us.  I look at him and I KNOW there are things he wants to do... but can't physically make himself do.   
And PLEASE - share this with your friends. (And get them to VOTE too!) 



At November 7, 2011 at 6:49 AM , Blogger Awn said...

I'm sorry! I couldn't resist after the doo-rag shot. :)

Running musts:
1. Running shoes from a store that watches you run. Trust me. You will pay more than going to Dick's or Rebok or Nike, but your feet and knees will thank you.
2. Under Armour or Nike Dri Fit clothing. It won't make your butt jiggle less but it will keep you drier and that means you won't focus on the sweat so much.
3. A good sports bra. Keep everything where it should be. Enough said.

I"m so proud of you!!!!

At November 7, 2011 at 7:05 AM , Blogger Kristen said...

Awn. Can I just show them the video of Pheobe running? And say, "I look just like that." ??

At November 7, 2011 at 7:17 AM , Blogger Awn said...

Absolutely! Think of it this way...if you're running like Phoebe you're getting in 2 workouts cause that arm flailing is definitely using some energy! :)

At November 7, 2011 at 8:03 AM , Blogger jen@ living a full life said...

J lo or jello you are one sick chick!

At November 7, 2011 at 8:44 AM , Blogger championm2000 said...

Okay, you made me laugh--

because this all hits WAY too close to home!

Running a 5k is still on my birthday list. I have 20 days until my next birthday. I don't need an app. I need a miracle (and a new body).

I am going to my first yoga class tonight. difference, right??

BTW, you should wear the bandana--attitude makes the difference!

At November 7, 2011 at 11:18 AM , Blogger Kristy said...

Haha Kristen you are so funny, but hang in there and keep trying. I hate running too, so I also end up walking a lot and running a little too. :)

At November 7, 2011 at 5:34 PM , Blogger Eric, Erin, Elsie and Emmy said...

Hey! I want to run with you!!! Yes, go to a store that watches and checks how you run. I have been using the same NB shoes for the last five years, just ordering new ones every 4 months or so. I love my nike dry fit stuff but I also run in cheap old navy running shorts and gasp, cotton sports bras. I am not fancy but hey I did just do my first marathon a month ago!!! I am not the prettiest runner nor the fastest. I run to be me and not for anyone else (well maybe my girls so I can be a role model!)

At November 8, 2011 at 12:36 AM , Blogger Non-Stop Mom said...

OK I have to throw in my 2 cents - because I wouldn't be me if I didn't.

When it comes to bras, go for an Enell. They're pricey (like *gasp!* pricey) but OMG they are so worth it. The girls will not budge from their protective layer of miracle fabric. I seriously can't run without mine on, or I'm in horrendous pain.

You can do this, chica! If I can do it, you can do it too!



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